Today marks week 16 of my pregnancy. I had another appointment with my obstetrician today as well. She couldn’t find my baby’s heartbeat with the Doppler. I wasn’t overly worried because I have finally started feeling the baby move, and I had felt her/him that morning and on the drive to the doctor. She gave up trying after several minutes and took me instead to the room with the ultrasound machine. She immediately found the baby, and she looks like a fully-formed little baby already. But, my heart was instantly in my throat because the baby wasn’t moving.
My precious baby wasn’t moving, and the doctor hadn’t been able to find the heartbeat with the Doppler. My immediate thought was to question how to approach such awful news with my husband. He is not feeling well and at work. I couldn’t just call him, could I? Wouldn’t it be better to tell him in person? I voiced my thought to my doctor. I just said that there’s no movement.
My doctor smiled, then moved the ultrasound thing around on my belly a bit and then I saw it. The baby’s heart was thumping and beating and pumping blood. I sighed with relief. What I saw next made both me and my doctor laugh–she yawned. She then started kicking and moving.
Let me also say I keep referring to the baby as a she for no real reason. I just think that this little soybean of mine is a girl. Four more weeks until we know for sure!
New This Month:
1. I got a flu shot. Ouch. Eva had tears in her eyes when I casually mentioned this at dinner. She was concerned it would hurt the baby. She doesn’t want her baby to have to get shots, or anyone she loves she said. It was really sweet.
2. I can feel the baby moving every now and then, some days more than others. I drank some Pepsi the other day. I drank about eight ounces, which is rare for me. About five minutes later, the baby kicked/somersaulted so hard I stopped eating mid-bite to smile. I will definitely stay away from caffeine from now on.
3. My belly is giant. I wasn’t this big until the five-six month mark with Eva. I am most definitely in full maternity gear. My doctor assures me this is normal for a second baby. I’m not entirely sure.
4. I’m only working every other weekend now. My wonderful, loving husband has strongly encouraged me to work less (he would prefer not at all) and focus on more important things such as Eva and writing. I can’t begin to tell him how much I appreciate this time I am getting at home to spend preparing our house for the baby. More importantly, I feel like this is a very special time I need to spend with Eva. These are the last months that she will ever have me completely to herself.
5. I am no longer vomiting, but I have these really annoying headaches that won’t go away. I know this is just a new phase of the progesterone working its magic in my body, but I still wish it could be magical in a vomit-free, pain-free way.
Not New This Month:
1. I still wake up to pee at least twice a night.
2. Lower belly pain (round ligament pain) is still my nemesis, especially if I try to move quickly.
3. I’m still moody. I cried because of a very stupid country song the other day just because the guy was singing about his daughter going away to college on the West Coast.
4. My boobs still hurt. I thought for some reason this went away in the second trimester last time around. Maybe it did, but not this time!
5. I was reminded the other day by a friend just how lucky I am to be pregnant. Secondary infertility was an unexpected problem for me, and it produced a wide range of really awful emotions. I don’t want to ever experience those feelings again, but I also know that going through second infertility has changed me. This just sounds silly to those that haven’t been there, I would imagine. But, secondary infertility, my struggle to even ovulate, has made me a stronger, better person that looks for the miracles and the upside to things. I have a renewed sense of faith and thankfulness. Not only is my little miracle baby priceless, but so is the way I feel about myself, my family, and my faith.
Only 168 days until my due date! Eva is getting more excited the bigger my belly gets. I’m getting more excited the more the baby moves. I think my husband is getting excited, too. He was sad he missed an ultrasound today but glad that everything turned out well. Come on 20 weeks!